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Some cases
of Domestic Violence against men in Nigeria
In a study conducted by Dienye and Gbeneol, (2009) at
the General Outpatient Department of the University of Port Harcourt Teaching
Hospital, out of a total of 48 victims of domestic violence that were
identified 5 (10.4%) were males. In the study, the following are summaries of
the case reports of some of the men abused by their wives.
Case 1
A 36-year-old mechanical engineer working on an oil
drilling platform presented with 2-day history of wound on the right leg. The
injury was said to have been sustained during a fight with his wife who in
annoyance poured hot water from a kettle on his leg. There had been previous
episode of disagreements with her in which she had physically abused him. He
reported this present episode to the police and was asked to obtain a medical
report from a physician. He refused divulging the cause of the disagreements.
Physical examination revealed scratches on the neck, bruises on the head, and
superficial burns on the right calf which was painted with gentian violet. A
diagnosis of husband abuse was made. He was treated. He was also given the
medical report for the police.
Case 2
A 43-year-old commercial bank manager presented in the company of a policeman with a 1-day history of wounds on the head, neck, and right arm. He had had a scuffle with his wife who had been suspecting him of infidelity because he was always returning home late from work. He came for the purpose of obtaining medical report from a physician for the police. Physician examination revealed bruises on the head and right arm, scratches on the neck, and welts on the left upper arm. A diagnosis of domestic violence against husband was made. He was treated, given the medical report, and counseled on adjusting his work schedule to avoid further occurrences.
Case 3
A 42-year-old labourer with no formal education presented
with scratches on the face and neck, and bruises on the face. He was
accompanied by his brothers who felt that the wife was unnecessarily aggressive
and domineering. She was accused of irrational demanding for money which he did
not have, considering his occupation, hence will not want the marriage to
continue. A diagnosis of domestic violence against husband was made. He was
treated, counseled on ways of improving his income, and referred to the
hospital.
Case 4
This 47-year-old farmer with secondary education was brought
to the hospital by his wife and a policeman, with bruises on the head and
scratches on the right upper arm. The injuries were sustained about 5 hours
after a fight with his wife. He was said to be a problem drinker and was in the
habit of beating his wife when drunk. He sustained these injuries when the wife
reacted in self-defense and reported the incidence to the police. A diagnosis
of domestic violence was made. He was treated of his wounds and referred to the
psychiatrists for further management.
Case 5
This 51-year-old trader with secondary education reported to
the hospital with scratch marks on the face and bruises on the hand. These
injuries were sustained during a fight with the wife. He claimed that his wife
was making excessive financial demands which he could not satisfy. Hence the
frequent disagreements, culminating in fights. He reported to the police and
was referred to the hospital to obtain medical report. A diagnosis of domestic
violence against the husband was made. He was treated, given medical report,
and counseled on how to improve his income.
Source: Domestic Violence against Men: Balancing the Gender Issues in Nigeria – Anthony Abayomi Adebayo
Suggested Analysis of Cases
Case 1
The male spouse sustained injury during a fight with his
wife. He claimed that there had been previous episodes of disagreements.
However, he failed to tell the police how long these disagreements started, he
also refused to disclose the cause of the disagreement of the latest fight that
led to his sustaining injuries from his wife.
Keeping “secrets” like this will not help the abused man in
resolving this obvious intimate partner violence against him. The best advice
to the abused man is to contact an appropriate Help Centre with the
determination to disclose all facts on the causes of disagreements between
himself and his wife. Otherwise, the abuse may continue and it may escalate to
a more dangerous level.
Case 2
A case of infidelity was alleged against the man by his wife
for returning home late from work. As a commercial bank manager, his work
schedule may honestly engage him to the late hours of the day. However, he has
to be open enough for his wife to believe him. The first step is to invite her
to his office for a couple of times and introduce her to his members of staff
particularly the junior managers. Thereafter, he may start to call her from the
office whenever he is to work late. After cracking some jokes with her on
phone, he could hand over the phone to one of the known staff to say hello to
her. He should also try not to miss her calls particularly after office hours,
and where he misses her call, the husband should endeavor to call her back
immediately and assure her that he was still in the office. He could also make
some intentional noise in the office, by calling a member of his staff aloud
while still on phone with his wife.
On his way home, he should also make calls across to her
while driving or in the public transport. He should remember that there is no
sacrifice too much so safe himself from the agony of intimate partner violence
from his spouse, which may lead to threat to his life, if not checked.
However, if the allegation of infidelity is true then he
should desist for peace to reign in his home.
Case 3
The wife of the abused man was alleged to be unnecessarily
aggressive and domineering. In addition, she was accused of irrationally
demanding for money, which the brother of the husband claimed he (the husband)
did not have, considering his occupation.
The way out of this abuse, in addition to the husband’s
income improvement is the need to invite the wife for counselling. She should
be asked, in the presence of her husband, on how she could assist her husband
considering his “meager” income. Her answer(s) to this question will shed more
light on the income improvement and the financial management or mismanagement
of the husband.
Case 4
The husband was said to be a problem drinker and was in the
habit of beating his wife when drunk. The possible counsel to this man is to
advise him on the likely danger of drunkenness to his personal life. If he
continues in this habit coupled with beating his wife when drunk; the wife may
be advised to leave the relationship through a proper legal procedure.
Case 5
The abused husband claimed that his wife was making excessive
financial demands which he could not satisfy. Hence, the frequent disagreements
leading to fights. In addition to counselling the husband on the improvement to
his income, the wife should also be counseled on how best she could support her
husband concerning the improvement to his income. Experience has shown that a
lot of men hide details of their incomes from their wives. This often prompt
the woman to “misbehave” believing that the husband actually earns more than
what he claims to be earning.
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